..:: B.L.I.N.D::..

Salam Alaik....

I feel soooo down now...miss that "alien" damn much...seriously i HATE this feelin..really hate that...is not drama...but i felt so awkward with this situation...i can't make any decision just to make people happy!!! Satisfied!! while I'm not happy with that...this is not naive move...this is stupid...idiot...how can i described my feelin inside me right now??? no words for that...no reason for that...i just need give n take in life...can make everybody happy wit me...

If i can turn around my time ..i wish I'm not here now.... let me start from nothing to be sumthing...let me falls to many times in case of learn in life....i couldn't make u see it..I did try my best...i wont let people take me down in life...its damn difficult...now its too late for me...too late...

I have no strength anymore to carry this pain...can i move forward n left everything behind??? It will make me looser or selfish?? i don't mind any junk around me...people can be so show off to me...but they can't prove it how success they are...i'm exhausted with this now...i really want to go...i dun wanna be blind again toward life...coz life can be too cruel to me.. 

I am a human..i did many mistake in life...i was failed in life too...till i cant stand anymore...life can be cruel to me...people around can be cruel toward me too...but i cant be cruel to my self...i need change..i need hand to holding me forever...even i know that hand will never exist..i need give chance for my self...to be sumone...to JUST BE MY SELF... without any remote control to controlling me...

Lets Time Make a Decision For Me....Lets THE LORD show me the way, coz i strongly keep my faith on HIM....